When stress hits, old defenses take over – overexplaining, people-pleasing, perfectionism, interrupting, even going silent and shutting down. The APPs MAP helps leaders understand these patterns and begin the inner work to reclaim calm, confidence, and choice so they can show up authentically and powerfully.
Facing and Embracing the Parts of Yourself You’d Rather Not See to Restore Wholeness, Confidence and Resilience
Ever cringe at someone’s weakness or beat yourself up for feeling “pathetic”? Jung called it the Shadow. Parts Work calls them Exiles. Facing them can feel unbearable — but it’s also the path back to real confidence, resilience, and wholeness. Through a fictional coaching conversation and the story of a sprout rising from ashes, you’ll see how even the parts you most resist can open the way to growth.
Most people approach values work intellectually. They:
❌ Pick words from a list
❌ Take an assessment
❌ Get a printout of their “top values”
And then… they’re stuck. Because words on a page don’t change your life.
Knowing your values intellectually won’t transform you.
Living them will.
Because values work isn’t about finding words that sound nice. It’s about finding what’s real.
And once you do, you’ll have something you can trust – something that, no matter how lost you feel, always leads you back to yourself.
A New Way to Relate to Yourself
This book is about solving the disconnect from your Authentic Self – not by fighting yourself, but by learning to listen, communicate, and lead yourself with heart, with compassion.
✔️ It explains the fundamentals of Self Leadership – the lifelong practice of living and leading from your Authentic Self.
✔️ It teaches Parts Work – how to recognize, understand, and harmonize the different parts of your psyche.
✔️ It includes exercises, dialogue examples, and guided practices to help you start these life-changing inner conversations.
✔️ It helps create safety within your mind, body, and nervous system so you can move beyond fear-driven reactions.
✔️ It shows you how to transform shame, pain, and fear into deeper self-acceptance.
Positive Intelligence, aka PQ, focuses on identifying and overcoming internal ‘saboteurs’ – so-called negative thought patterns that can interfere with success and wellbeing. While this model resonates with many, it also presents critical limitations, particularly for individuals with histories of trauma, chronic stress, or unresolved inner conflict.
This article examines the strengths and shortcomings of the PQ framework, exposes the risks of oversimplified coaching approaches and inadequate coach education, and makes the case for a more trauma-wise, compassionate, and heart-centered approach – one that supports both coaches and individuals in fostering deeper self-awareness, self-acceptance, healing, and authentic growth.
