Bringing Hearts to Life
In a recent podcast interview with Executive Couples Coach, Uwe Dockhorn, I shared my responses to the 6 core questions he asks all his guest coaches. I think all the questions are really important and will help you get to know more about the heart centered, self leadership coaching work I do. One is uniquely different than the rest and may give you a deeper sense of what I’m like deep down.
I sincerely appreciate the atmosphere and spirit Uwe creates when interviewing his guests, and what an appreciative listener he is. You can learn about him and his work here: https://www.uwedockhorn.com
Here’s a clip of my response to The Goosebump Question!
You can listen to the whole interview below, or read my responses in the transcript that follows.
Six Core Questions in Roughly 12 Minutes
Uwe: How are you doing Guy, and where are you hanging out right now?
Guy: I’m doing well. I’m honored to be here with you, and I’m hanging out in Richmond Hill, Ontario a town just north of Toronto.
Uwe: Guy Reichard is a transformational coach with 12 years experience helping people reconnect to their true selves to create a life they love, with greater confidence, wellbeing and fulfillment. I think your mission to Bringing Hearts to Life is remarkable, so I’m very thankful I can talk to you today, Guy.
Guy: Thank you so much. It’s an honor to be here.
Uwe: Oh, the honor’s mine. Alright, shall we get to it?
Guy: Let’s do it!
Who’s your ideal client and what’s the biggest challenge they face?
Guy: Honestly, that’s a tough question for me because I like to work with a wide variety of people, with different situations and needs. It could be an executive, a purpose-driven entrepreneur, or even a young professional or retiree – but – what they have in common is they want to grow, evolve, and become more free to be who they are. And since this is also “ideal” – they love to learn, and are willing to do the required work for personal transformation.
As far as a challenge – I would say that the root of it is the same and it’s that they’re not connected to and living from their Authentic Self – and that shows up in a lot of offshoots or other problems – like a lack of authenticity, or lack meaning & purpose they’re experiencing, impostor syndrome often, people-pleasing or perfectionism, tough inner critics, and we can connect this all back to the disconnect and not really living from their true self.
Uwe: With all these facts that happen to a lot of us, in a way, I can imagine there are common mistakes also for your clients that they make when trying to solve these problems.
What are the common mistakes people make when trying to solve that problem?
Guy: Well the first thing is that they’re not even aware that this is the problem, or the root of the problem, so they focus on symptoms or the offshoots of that problem. And they do the same thing in various new ways or doing the same thing over and over, which we can put under the banner of “Avoidance” – they work harder and try to achieve more – achieve relief or fulfillment, by thinking, doing and achieving – by doing more on the outside, without changing on the inside. They’re technically avoiding their inner worlds – their emotions, their fears, even their joys, instead of facing them head on, feeling them and dealing with them in beneficial or life-enhancing ways that increase resilience, relief and wellbeing.
Uwe: Yeah, their wellbeing. It’s a good point. You know, change starts from within, that’s for sure.
What is one valuable free action that our audience can easily implement that will help with that issue?
Guy: Well, they could make a DECISION. A decision is free. A decision to go inwards, discover who they really are, face their true feelings, and put an end to putting themselves last, and put an end to the achievement treadmill. It’s definitely free but not easy. They can find out who they really are & live from that place more of the time.
Uwe: I can totally see that and I think you and I already achieved that. It’s so rewarding. It’s totally different and many people are also afraid of that. Would you agree?
Guy: I do. I do absolutely agree. And it’s the fear that makes what I’m saying sound cliche, makes it seem like that can’t be the answer but as we embark on our own journeys of personal growth, we learn that our work is not done. It’s not a fantasy, like we get there and have ever-lasting peace. It is a lot of work to keep connecting, to keep transcending our fear, facing it. Life goes on. New challenges come. We peel back the layers of the onion on who we are and we get to keep growing.
Uwe: I like that you also just said that the free advice is to make a decision – and because it’s free it’s so important. We’re making so many decisions. Let me give you the spotlight to share more….
What is one valuable free resource that you can direct people to that will help with that issue?
Guy: Since I talked a bit about not facing our inner world and of living in a way of doing everything outside/externally, in the spirit of our conversation today, I took one of the resources or exercises that I share with my clients in my training course called RIP NOTES (Rip in Pieces). The crux of the exercise is to put down in writing, expressive, messy, emotional writing – whatever is going on inside. Difficult thoughts, feelings, emotions, situations that they’re experiencing, and really get it out of them.
Put it down as messy as they can, illegibly, pour it out, and when they’re done without any analysis, without any thinking or without or any attachment – to rip it up into pieces and let it go. Then to sit for a bit, do some deep belly breathing and conjure up some compassionate understanding for what they were just carrying. What’s been inside.
Maybe some of this stuff is very old. Maybe it’s just from yesterday or today and to be on their own side. And if any inspiration comes from that, it doesn’t have to, it’s worth it in itself just to be with your emotions, be with them, process them and let them go but often enough we clear up some space, some room or energy and maybe an idea comes of how we want to live, something we want to change, something we want to move towards that scares us perhaps, or that could make us happy.
Uwe: So I would like to give you the opportunity to share more of these kinds of resources so please feel free to share where folks can check you out.
Guy: Well that exact exercise can be found at HeartRich.ca/ripnotes, and again the RIP stand for Rip in Pieces
Uwe: Thank you for sharing, and again the link will be in the show notes.
What’s the one question I should have asked you that would be of great value to our audience?
Guy: Well, could have asked me about Why HeartRich? Or what does the heart have to do with it?
I would say that we can leverage the heart – the actual physical heart and the heart as a symbol of love and courage…
With the physical heart we can intervene in our own nervous system, to help optimize our state of being, help us build our resilience through mindbody practices like cultivating coherence. We can also learn to regularly nurture or generate these positive, loving, regenerative emotions like gratitude, appreciation, compassion, kindness, – heart rich emotions.
The effects of that help us improve our heart rate variability, our vagal tone, really nurturing our state of being that result in many positive effects on our state of being. They help us increase and our performance and our enjoyment, as well as and our influence on others.
As far as the heart as a symbol – we come back to the core of who we are, we come back to the authentic self when we focus on what we love, what matters to us most, our deepest values, what we care about, and we try to put into action some steps that will help us honor that.
Uwe: Well that sounds absolutely fascinating, and before we even started, this was really what I admire about your work and you personally, that you put the heart at the center of your work, your self, and it just feels so right to talk about this and to listen to all the insights that you shared. I’m very thankful that you shared it today. Wonderful.
Guy: Thank you!
Uwe: That brings me to my final question. We’re getting into the Heart Centered Territory right now and it is …
When was the last time you experienced Goosebumps with your family and why?
Guy: If I can take maybe an extra minute for this one and give a bit of a back-story.
My wife and I met at a personal development workshop 19 years ago. Then we didn’t see each other for nearly a year, and then we met again at another workshop – and out of a blue, I guess I was staring at her, she’s not only beautiful she’s got this special aura about her – so I’m staring at her and she throws me this look – she crosses her eyes and contorts her face and I just laugh out loud in the middle of this workshop.
Anyway, we met for dinner a few nights later and we’ve been together ever since. So, fast forward 18 years later to not long ago, we’re on the couch streaming some show that had a theme of life after death and I said to her if that’s true, I’m gonna find you and I’ll give you that look so you’ll know it’s me, and she says “SAME”.
And that gave me goosebumps. That melted my heart because there was a time, a long time in my life where I believed that I would never… nobody would ever accept me or tolerate me, or put up with my “stuff”, and here she is, not only wiling to put up with me in this life, she’s willing to do it all over again in the next one. So, that really touched me.
Uwe: Very touching, very emotional. Thank you for sharing this beautiful goosebump moment. I’m having the shivers all through the story. So what a beautiful story. Thank you for sharing this beautiful goosebump moment and also thank you for our conversation, it was a pleasure talking to you and I appreciate very much the knowledge and insights you shared with us today.
Guy: Me as well. Thank you. It’s been an honor to be here with you and I really appreciate your work and what you put out there.